i Love, i Adore, i Phone
5.) Is your husband a gamer? Does your child have an obsession with dogs? (ahem) Does your friend talk constantly of her undying love for Edward? Write a poem to the item your loved one is obsessing over.
You have the shape that many men adore
You’re podded and angled, how much could you store?
He loves you, adores you, and holds you all day
His eyes, his attention, is yours if you stay.
The apps, the music, the shiny grey screen
Will hold him, enchant him, as if in a dream.
Ah, life is so fragile, and love but a whim,
When true it is not, a lie you are to him.
Should all power fail, all generators die,
You would not survive and I know he’d cry.
In time he’ll recover, the shaky hands will calm
My hand will replace you, my voice be his balm.
He will go on, survive, and eventually thrive
A fine coaster from you he may soon derive
Where on a fine table you will ever remain
To stop perspiring cups from warping the wood grain.
Yes, you tempting device sent from my enemy Apple
You shall not have him or we will soon grapple.
Your corners, your screen, will be but a dream
Of days long gone when you were his queen.
One flush, one drop from a very great height
Will be your end, so say Nighty-night!