Thoughts on "World Peace" (or "harsher punishment for parole violators"):
"How am I supposed to get along if you don't let me do what I want?" --Douglas
It seems like Vladimir Putin, Osama Bin Laden, Attila the Hun, O.J. Simpson, the Joker, Gargamel, Mr. Hyde, Lex Luther, the Borg Queen, Darth Vadar, Kahn, and the Sheriff of Nottingham, have all been reading Douglas' Book of Unfairness (now available in Russian, Arabic, Chinese, English, Nonsensical, Archaic English, and Borgese). To give us hope and a foot in the door of peace, he states that he could get along under certain conditions, but only after the will of the opposition has been subdued. "Ah...now I can get along. You just sit there with your eyes crossed, relishing in the fairy mesmer that tells you that "all ways are my ways." The mommies of all of the above non-get-alonger-ists need padded cells or a super power installed promptly!
Thoughts on Reproduction and the ultimate fanny pack:
Reed: How do baby Kangaroos get out and into their mommy's pouch?
Douglas: Oh, I know, when the baby is ready to come out, the stomach cracks open and then you see the baby in the pouch.
Brilliant! I love it when Reed and Douglas answer each other's questions. I don't think I'll have to do too much when the bigger questions come. They'll either give each other the answers from their over active imaginations, look the answer up in the illustrated book, Dino and Dina Find an Egg, p. 35 (that's not the real title, but it should be), ask one of their friends or cousins, or finally corner mommy who will say, "the doctor cut a whole in my stomach and pulled you out, really! But how you got there is...uh...where do you think babies come from?