"Als Gregor Samsa eines Morgens aus unruhigen Träumen erwachte, fand er sich in seinem Bett zu einem ungeheueren Ungeziefer verwandelt."
(As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a monstrous vermin).
I've joined a cardio workout class with my friend Melisa, faithfully attending 3 days a week. I totally recommend getting out of "the Machine" room and exploring the other sweat infested rooms of the gym. I've gotten a much more thorough workout with the jumping around, stepping, and faux boxing then I ever did confined to my Eliptical. Not that I plan to completely abandon the Eliptical for we have had a great relationship and I have gotten many a book read while in its presence. But, if you don't move other parts of your body, you discover, quite to your surprise and disgust, that you have muscles in other places that have atrophied to the point of deflation. Of course, with any unexplored territory, there are pluses and minuses to muscles rediscovery.
I came home after one of my workouts and moved my arm only to hear the tune of one of those newly discovered muscles as it wailed in a high pitch, "ouch!" The inspiration for this entry came from the final stage of our work out. As I lay with both legs and arms in the air, struggling as best I could to place them into an abdominal strengthening position I instantly saw myself as Gregor Samsa in Die Verwandlung. I was the bug, lying on my back and looking up at the white tiled ceiling of the exercise room, unable to roll over or move. I thought at the moment, this must be what it would feel like if I were a bug and were to meet my end under florescent lighting. It makes me wonder if the final muscles to atrophy in a bug are the abdominal muscles.
The countless number of spiders, beetles, cockroaches, and other vermin might all still be around if only they'd taken the time to work out those vital life saving muscles. "I...can't...roll..over...aaaahhhh....I always thought it would be different. Perhaps a violent crunch while meeting the bottom of a big shoe, but not the low buzz of a flickering florescent basement light and the gentle clacking of the owners coins drying in the dryer. Where's the glory in finding oneself dead on ones back because of a life bereft of sit ups?"