An Empirical Education
5.) List 10 things you never knew until you were mom.
1. That boogers make a stronger adhesive than super glue.
2. When children are too quiet for too long they are most likely asleep or getting into some very, very, very deep trouble.
3. Patience truly is a virtue.
4. Children can scream in pitches that if contained could probably cut through metal in the same way Superman’s laser vision does.
5. That I should have taken classes in aerodynamics, physics, paleontology, and chemistry instead of focusing on humanities. Oh, the questions I could answer if I’d been properly educated in college.
6. Gas/or bodily humor is just about the funniest type of humor on earth.
7. That I’d gain 3 extra memory carriers. Whenever I take my children to the grocery store I no longer need a list, I just assign each one a few things to remember. Of course, the list is always somewhat augmented to include Skittles or Hershey's bars, but we’re still pretty close in the end.
8. That there are people who start off each day at a jog. Just this morning, Isaac woke up, heard his brothers from his bed, jumped out of his covers and was down the hallway before his stuffed bear could even say good morning.
9. That all you need for a good abdominal workout is a child willing to share his perspectives on the universe, the digestive tract, and what the tooth fairy wears when on the job.
10. That I was only seeing a fragment of the beauty and size of life and love. How can the heart hold so much?